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Monday, October 17, 2011

Bar #38: Home Tavern

2828 N. Lincoln Ave.
8:00pm, Thursday, October 6
Price of Old Style: $2.50 bottles


The Home Tavern has the most accurate name of any bar we've been in...golf clubs in the corner, plants everywhere, and a huge bag of dog food sitting next to the pool table.  I think we warped into some dude's basement when we walked in the door.  The dog food belonged to a nice black lab named Potato who never moved the whole time we were there.  Also, there is a very creepy collection of stuffed toys that hangs from the ceiling (no picture, which I will describe why in a minute).

The highlights of the evening were this exchange between two regulars:

"Hey Nancy, what's new?"
"Well, I saw that 'Craigslist Killer' movie the other night, and it really reminded me of you..."





Also, there were a couple of locals hanging out, and these guys were true locals.  They grew up and have lived in Lincoln Park for 40+ years...never left the neighborhood as it has changed over the years.  These were some tough mofos too...one guy, Mike, decided to tell us his entire life story, and it scared the shit out of me.  I didn't want to break eye contact in fear that he was gonna bust his beer bottle over my head.

Mike told me about his four daughters, and how his oldest one was dating a real degenerate, and that their car was just repossessed.  He also then told me that he might have to deal with the situation himself (like this guy), and then tells us about his time in prison (stealing cars) and shows us the scars from when he got stabbed (was hanging in Mexico with the wrong people).  Then he rants about how technology is ruining the kids nowadays...needless to say my iPhone stayed in my pocket the whole time.

I did my part though.  I listened.  Mike and I hugged it out when we left.  I survived.

A warning to all you Lincoln Park-ers with the popped collars, texting your buddies non-stop, drinking Bud Light Lime and doing Jaeger shots.  Don't go to the Home Tavern, because if Mike is there, he will mess you up...

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